Infertility, Parenthood Experiences

MY story; OUR miracle.

My mom birthed me at age 16 years old and ever since I could remember, she made me promise her that I would not be a teen mom – that I would do all the things she wanted to do as a teen and young adult. Little did I know, the act of conceiving a child naturally was going to be very hard for me.

I was a late bloomer. Puberty didn’t hit me until age 15! Many women would say, “Lucky you,” but I was internally freaking out and wondering when was I going to get the honor of becoming a woman. When my cycles finally did come, they were sporadic and violently painful, sometimes missing school or work were my only options.

Fast forward about 10 years >>> I’m a newlywed of three years and ready to extend my family. My partner and I are trying BUT no conception.

No one can prepare you for the emotional agony of negative pregnancy tests. I again felt like I did as a teenager – wondering, what is wrong with me? Why NOT me? My husband and I both had careers, owned our home/cars, and weren’t living pay check-to-paycheck. We were ready. My body was not…

At this age in life, my friends were having kids and even my younger sister and brother were having kids.  I was becoming angry at the world. I looked around and saw so many people accidentally getting pregnant and women having babies within a year of trying. My hope and energy were drained; we decided to seek out medical help.

Soon after visiting an OBGYN doctor and getting an ultrasound, my husband and I found out that I have  PCOS – Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. My pelvic ultrasound reveiled many cysts (former eggs) just sitting in my ovaries. Putting all the technicalities aside, it basically meant my body was not ovulating. I can’t get pregnant without an egg in my uterus. In short, it is just REALLY hard for me to get pregnant.

PCOS is treatable, so through prayer and a hormone regime, we were committed to overcoming infertility. About eight months later, in October of 2013, we were blessed with OUR MIRACLE and finally got a positive pregnancy test.

Unspeakable joy flooded our hearts. Even as I write this post, tears are streaming from my eyes.  The miracle happened right when I felt like giving up, but God…

Before we told any and everyone, we made sure the pregnancy would stick. Sure enough, at 10 weeks pregnant, an ultrasound reveiled I had blood in my uterus – a sign of a miscarriage. My heart dropped. Anger filled my soul. Tears and screams burst from my face. I got myself together the next morning, went to work and taught my class. After school, I drove to an empty parking lot and screamed/cried/prayed some more. My husband called and reminded me that stress will only make my uterus more stressed. So I chose to let go and let God. Within two weeks, the blood cleared up. The chance of a miscarriage had withered away.

I was on my way through a positive pregnancy. Then, week 22 of my pregnancy I started having painful contractions. I couldn’t stand or walk. I was projectile throwing up and could not control my bladder. We rushed to urgent care and urgent care wheeled me into the birthing center. The tears of fear streamed again! The nurses didn’t know if I was having my baby. My husband and I were so scared. The pain was every 5-7 minutes. Fast forward several hours >>> the doctor determined that I was passing a kidney stone and gave me props for handling the pain so well. She said if I can handle kidney stone pain, I can handle childbirth pain too. We thought we were loosing our baby, but God…

Anyhoot, the reason why I’m sharing my story is to remind myself that these kinds of miracles are possible. We are trying to conceive again and my body has been worse after having my first child. People say you’re more fertile after your first baby; well the opposite has happened to me.  I didn’t have a cycle until 20 months after having my son. He’s currently 22 months. We are currently on another hormone regime and feverishly putting our faith in God (not ashamed of that).

I may have PCOS for the rest of my life, but through faith and modern medicine, I know it can happen. But if my first miracle is all that is in my deck of cards I’ve been dealt in life, then I’m more than grateful! 



13 thoughts on “I N F E R T I L I T Y

  1. Read this piece Kelly. What an ordeal. I have never had the infertility problem, but as you probably know, We did have a stillborn daughter at 7 months in between Aaron and Jesse. I too felt anger at all the people having babies without effort. It’s hard to see others overjoyed when you are suffering a loss. I pray this next baby “happens” for you and Kerry. I know what loving people you are and you deserve another little one to share that love with.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Wow Kelly! I had no idea. What a miracle. We are realizing our little miracle as well. After trying for another one we ere heartbroken last year when I miscarried twice. We are still not giving up but it’s hard with all these women around me getting pregnant. looking into infertility options soon and accupuncture. Thanks for sharing your story and prayers for another miracle for both of us! Makes you love your son all that much more.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow Annette; same to you. You are a strong mama. I tried acupuncture too. Sending love and support your way.


  3. Hey Kelly! Such a beautiful and heartfelt read! You have grown so much and I am so happy for you! I too have PCOS and thought I could not conceive until I was pregnant as a result of rape. I’ve gained so much peace once I was finally able to put a name to my condition though. I’m thankful that we are not what we have. You are so wise and strong for sharing your story! I pray that it helps someone and I’ll be praying for your next bundle of joy to come soon for you two! Your family is so adorable!!! #greatblog

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow Keisha! You are strong and such a beautiful person; thank you for sharing your story with me. I remember when we were “twins” for volleyball because we were both short. Now we bond over PCOS. Thank you again for sharing and praying for our next bundle of joy.


  4. I’ve never been to an infertility specialist but I tried for 9 years to get pregnant with no results. Thankfully it didn’t happen at that time because I’m no longer with that person but it makes me wonder if I might have PCOS. My doctor mentioned it once but threw it out because I’m not overweight and my periods are regular however painful. So I’ve put it into God’s hands. I’m 34 now so if he wants me to have a baby then he’ll bless me with one. Maybe he thinks I’m not ready yet. I’m so happy that you got your miracle. It’s great to see someone overcoming something I’ve struggled with because it gives me hope. Thanks so much for sharing your story πŸ™‚


    1. I definitely understand. Not only am I not overweight, but I am underweight, therefore I am not the typical PCOS woman.
      I’d also request a pelvic ultrasound if I were you – just to examine your reproductive system.
      God also has his own timing, continue to bring the request to God.

      Thank you for reading my blog post.


  5. <3<3<3 Wow! Thank you so much for sharing your story! Praise the Lord that you were blessed with your miracle baby!


  6. I’m glad to read this. I have one awesome little boy, but it’s been a hard road having another. Thanks for putting hope out there! Also, OMG, I have had kidney stones and they are the worst. I’ve heard they can be more common in pregnancy, and when I had them last year, the doctor was surprised I hadn’t had them in pregnancy. I said well I hope never to have them again, because it was horrendous!! Anyway, I’m glad you wrote about this, and I wish you the best for having your next child, too!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Thank you for sharing this. I’ve witnessed my best friend struggle through infertility and have been truly amazed at the work of God throughout her journey. Bless you for keeping your faith during a time when it would have been easy to give up. God works in the struggle, in the joy & in the pain. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

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