Phases of Motherhood – My Mother’s Day Reflection of Gratitude

Parenthood Experiences

This Mother’s Day seemed different… in a good way. Have you ever gone through a day and felt like it was a life lesson while you’re experiencing the day? It’s rare, but definitely happens to me. During my Mother’s Day, I learned a perspective-changing lesson.

MIDNIGHT – I barely slept the night of Mother’s Day because my two year old woke up a few times demanding cuddles and a newborn breastfeeding every 3 hours. When I officially woke up at 8:30 am, my late grandma who passed away last year was on my mind – missing her and wishing I could open up one more card from her on Mother’s Day.  I was reminded of how GRATEFUL she was to have children and grandchildren to share her love with. I was reminded how significant her role was in my life – a mother figure.

MORNING – As a family, my partner and two kids, we traveled downstairs to make the most delicious, mixed berry scones from a family friend’s recipe. GRATEFUL. I admired our teamwork and joyous moment of creating food together. My husband had planned the day for me and so far Mother’s Day was starting off berry delicious! My newborn cheerfully bobbled her head around, fully alert, and focusing on the sounds around her. My toddler was taking initiative and wanting to take part in every part of the recipe. The notion of innocence blanketed us. This would be my first and last Mother’s Day with both a newborn and toddler at the same time; GRATITUDE for our current season of parenthood.

Next stop – CHURCH. We are a family of believers and I strongly believe that it is only God that I have the privilege of being a mother. Anyone who knows us personally know that our kids are miracles. Worship today was led by our amazing friends and moreover, during worship, I immediately felt God’s presence overflow my soul with GRATITUDE. Grateful to be alive and well; grateful for God’s love; grateful to be a mother (even though it’s really hard sometimes). The pastor’s message was even focused on not complaining lol!

…And then… MY IN-LAWS. Paying respect and spending time with those who came before us is important. I’m not going to deny that I want to be totally selfish on Mother’s Day and only celebrate myself but the truth is, I wouldn’t be who I am without the generations before me AND I wouldn’t be married to my wonderful partner without the generations who came before him. Therefore, I am GRATEFUL. I love my husband, therefore I love who he’s come from.

As I was at my in-laws, I realized something profound – motherhood has different phases. One day I’m dreaming/envisioning what I want my future family to be like, next I’m actually a mother, and last I’ll transition into a grandmother/be a different kind of mother to my kids.

This process of motherhood has different stages and it may or may not be hard to transition through them. I’m already mourning the fact that I’m done with pregnancy part of motherhood – feeling a growing human inside my womb is permanently a memory and now I’m a different kind of mother to my kids than when they were in my uterus.

Being a mother to children under five is different from a mother whose children are school-aged, which is different from a mother whose children are in college, and so on. Sooooo, naturally, a grandmother is different from being a mother. Grandmothers aren’t mothers who used to be mothers, they are still  mothers. Sooooo, being a grandmother is important and deserves to be celebrated too.

Lastly – Surprise Y.O.L.O. SOLO. My hubby blesses me with some kid-free time and a glass (or two) of Peach Bellini. Again, surrounded by generations before me – my aunt, cousin, godmom, and I laughed and sipped the afternoon away! We finished the evening with a delicious family dinner – fried fish, collard greens, spaghetti, and garlic bread.

In one room, we had mothers who’ve lost unborn/born children, a mother of a newborn, mother of a toddler, mother of a school-aged child, mother of a graduating high school senior,  and a grandmother.

The central theme that ran through ALL the phases of motherhood is once you are a mother, you are always a mother! Just let that sit with you for a moment… that realization, if you really think about it, is PROFOUND. So many women share this commonality, yet we as a social circle, we can be so divisive and divided.

Let’s shift to GRATITUDE. Think of one thing that makes you grateful for the special women around us and/or in our lives, from friends and coworkers to family members.


#appreciate #support #NWMamahood #Mamahood


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